A screwover of everything you know about Kiddy Girl- And
by FunahoMisaki
Summary: I was reading one of my new stories and had an idea...which was born of coco-cola and sugar might I add. What if two to three years before the start of the series Ascouer had been turned into a toddler and been raised by Hiver and the other E.S. members? Prepare for lots and lots of chaos and wacky hijinks! AU OOC CUTE!BABY!ASCOUER and MOMMY!HIVER with DADDY!SOMMER! maybe rated M
1. Asco-chan

**Kiddy Girl AND screw-up**

**By: FunahoMisaki**

**(A/N: I own nothing and what if just before the start of the series Ascouer had been reverted back into a two year old during an accident on a training assignment? Now being raised back to her proper age by Hiver and Sommer watch how this effects the whole series! AU OOC Cute!Baby!Ascouer Mommy!Hiver maybe some femslash later in the story and maybe some bashing.)**

"You sent for us Director?" Tweedle Dumb asked as he and his sister walked into the Directors office for their assignment, the normally stern woman behind the desk not looking near as frightening as she could with a three year old pink haired toddler on her lap coloring.

"Dee! Dum!" The toddler said happily as she glanced up from the picture she was drawing and saw the twins standing there both smiling at her.

"Hi there little Asco-chan. Guess what I got for you?" Tweedle Dee asked reaching into her pocket where there was a small present waiting for the child.

"I ge' gif'?" Ascouer asked her eyes brightening as she stared at them happily. It never ceased to worry and amaze everyone that despite the fact that the E.S. members and candidates brought her a gift at least once a week the girl always seemed happy and surprised at getting a present. The first time she had been given a gift after being turned into a toddler was when she was just over a year old, it broke the others hearts when Ascouer cried with happiness over the simple white daisy that Tweedle Dumb had given her. Careful questioning of the girl that had hugged Tweedle Dumb and refused to let go had revealed that it was the first ever present she had gotten at that age.

"Go on sweetie. You don't want to keep Tweedle Dee waiting do you?" Hiver asked softly as she gently took the child off of her lap and placed her on the ground, the small girl hugging her for a second before running to hug Tweedle Dumb and then Tweedle Dee.

"Looky. I know how much you like to color so I got you a brand new box of crayons. It has all sorts of colors!" Tweedle Dee said grinning as she removed the bright colored box from her pocket and causing Ascouer to bowl her over when she tackled the black haired girls legs in a hug.

"'ank yew!" Ascouer said hugging Tweedle Dee's legs tightly as she grinned up at the giggling woman who sat up and gave her a hug back.

"You're welcome Asco-chan." Tweedle Dee said placing the box firmly into Ascouers tiny hands after she had managed to gently detangle her legs from the pink haired tot. Most of the E.S. members wondered if Ascouer had some kind of super strength since her hugs were incredibly strong for a three year old.

"Asco-chan." Hiver called getting her adoptive daughters attention as she smiled gently at the child. After the accident they had tried to track down Ascouers parents in order to inform them about what had happened but it turned out her parents had died when she was little so they took turns watching after the child until Hiver settled on an idea she had been toying with since the accident.

She formally adopted Ascouer as her own daughter and made sure that the small pink haired child was always well provided for and taken care of. Trixie would swear she broke a rib or three laughing at the look on Hivers face when little Ascouer called her 'mama' for the first time. That doubled into six broken ribs when Ascouer had called Sommer 'dada' and that had caused Un-oh to nearly die due to being unable to breathe he was laughing so hard.

"Mama has to talk with the Twins about boring adult stuff." Hiver began, chuckling slightly when Ascouer pulled a face. She had sat in on one of her mama's meetings once cause everyone else was too busy to watch her and she had fallen asleep in her mama's lap halfway through. The others still chuckled about that occasionally, especially since Sommer had taken some pictures of the look on the other people's faces when Hiver had carried the toddler into the room with a diaper bag slung over her shoulder.

"Why don't you go down to the Café and play with Q-feuille?" Hiver asked causing Ascouer to perk up happily, Q-feuille was always fun to play with although Hiver had refused to leave Ascouer with Q-feuille for two whole months once when the then two year old had picked up some of the purple haired teens exploding chocolates and managed to nearly blow up the café when she had dropped them all on accident.

"Bye bye mama! Daddy! Dee! Dum!" Ascouer said hugging everyone happily before running to go find her friend that always saved a few of the non-exploding chocolates for her.

"Ah! No running in the halls Asco-chan!" Hiver shouted after her daughter causing the others snickering slightly since Ascouer never listened to that, not even when she had once slipped and slid all the way down the hall until someone had managed to stop her just before she had hit the stairs although from how she had been squealing happily she had enjoyed the ride across the floor…

"Asco-chan! You came to visit me!" A large woman(?) with blond hair and dark skin said scooping up Ascouer when she had wandered into the café, heading straight for where Q-feuille was serving some of their receptionist friends.

"Mi! Mi!" Ascouer said happily at the sight of the woman(?) that always had candy for her. Sure enough the large person reached behind the counter and handed Ascouer a small bag of Skittles and sent her over towards the table Q-feuille was serving. Q-feuille immediately sat down a small cup half-full of orange juice in front of Ascouer while the receptionist with green hair had opened the pack of Skittles for the small girl.

"'ank yew! Hewe!" Ascouer said handing a few of the Skittles to Alisa, then to Belle, then to Q-feuille before eating her own. Ascouer giggled as she watched Mi-nou argue with one of the other waitresses about her underwear before standing and taking off her own cloths.

"Mi! Mi! Off!" Ascouer exclaimed happily, causing the two receptionist and nearby workers that had been watching the argument in amusement to nearly die in laughter while Mi-nou turned around and nearly had a heart attack. No one but a giggling Q-feuille noticed Hiver and Sommer entering the café for their lunch break.

"Ack! Not you Asco-chan! You need to put your cloths back on quick before your mom sees you like this! She'll kill me!" Mi-nou exclaimed in a panic while Q-feuille giggled slightly when she saw the look on Hivers face.

"Ack! The director!" Alisa said suddenly noticing the green haired woman in the orange and white suit and causing everyone to panic.

"Mama! Mama! Off!" Ascouer said running over and hugging her mama's legs, leaving her clothes on the floor behind her.

"Yes. I see you took your clothes off Asco-chan." Hiver said staring down at her daughter wide eyed while Ascouer grinned at her mama before yanking on her mama's pants leg.

"Mama off 'oo!" Ascouer said pulling on her mama's pants leg, causing Hiver to blush ever so slightly while the nearby workers couldn't believe what they had just witnessed. Their bosses daughter told their boss to take her clothes off in the middle of a café! Of course the kid was only three so she didn't really understand it…

"No sweetheart. Mama's not taking off her clothes." Hiver said sighing as she walked forward and picked up her daughters cloths.

"You need to get yours back on though. Hands up!" Hiver said causing Ascouer to lift her small arms and hands into the air for her mama to slip her shirt back over her head.

"There we go. Now please try not to take them off again." Hiver said after she had finished redressing her daughter who grinned and nodded at this.

"Alright now go sit with your daddy while I talk with Mi-nou-san about adult stuff for a moment." Hiver said causing Ascouer to scrunch up her nose at the mention of 'adult stuff' and immediately grab onto her daddy's hands. Mi-nou tried to turn and sneak away but Hiver's hand shot out and grabbed her by her shirt collar.

"I believe me and you need to have a little talk about what's an appropriate influence on my daughter…during which I will be using words like crucifixion and castration." Hiver said with a sickly sweet smile on her face that caused chills to go up everyones spines.

If you asked who would win between an over six foot tall woman(?) made of pure muscles and a woman of about five foot four inches without heels that was rather slim and looked to have virtually no muscles most would say the six foot tall one would win easily.

If you asked someone who had seen what Hiver did and said to Mi-nou next they would tell you Hiver wins hands down and that she could probably take on a genetic dragon on her own and win with minimal damage…


	2. Bad Puppy!

**Kiddy Girl AND screw-up**

**By: FunahoMisaki**

**(A/N: I own nothing and read last chapter.)**

"Ah excuse me misters." Belle said when a few old men that had been part of one of the tours of the G.T.O. earlier walked into the café. The old men had 'gotten lost' during the tour and weren't supposed to be in here right now. Belle was more than a little surprised when the men caught sight of Hiver who was giggling lightly as she tried to wipe off her daughters pumpkin covered face and grinned. If there was one thing that was the same about Ascouer it was her love of pumpkin pudding.

"Um old guys?" Belle asked tilting her head at them curiously while Hiver looked up just in time to see the 'old men' drop their disguises to reveal that they were young men in their underwear. Her Killing Intent skyrocketed at that moment. These bastards were running around almost completely naked in front of her daughter!

"Hehe. Off off!" Ascouer said giggling slightly as she saw the nearly naked men and thought that she was supposed to take her cloths off to, which caused her mamas Killing Intent to become seeable. That was the moment where the men were suddenly in combat armor and aiming their guns at Hiver, letting several bullets fly towards the small family while Hiver covered Ascouer with her body to shield her from the bullets. Thankfully it didn't come to that as Sommer threw up a pocket space shield that absorbed the bullets while the emergency alarm rang outside of the café as one of the armored men put up some green substance that would keep the rest of the world out of the Café, completely sealing it off.

"You boys just made a big mistake." Hiver said standing and her glasses glinting dangerously as Ascouer hid behind her mamas legs and peeked out at the 'bad guys' in her words.

"How so? You don't seem to realize that you're trapped in here with us." The lead gunman said causing Hiver to grin viciously.

"No you didn't trap me in here with you. You trapped yourselves in here with _me_ **after** _you shot at_ _**my daughter**_." Hiver said gently untangling her pants legs from Ascouers grip and motioning for Sommer to take the small pink haired toddler even though her voice was rather demonic sounding to the rest of the Café and the gunmen. Hivers grin widened to bloodthirsty proportions as she cracked her neck and the gunmen opened fire on her, missing her completely when she disappeared from their line of sight.

"Wha-!? Where'd she go?" One of the gunmen asked looking around frantically for the director who had seemed to disappear from sight. A dull thud sound had the other four gunmen swiveling around to look as one of their own fell to the floor unconscious. Behind him was the 'missing' director with her fist outstretched casually, by the dent and crack in the out cold gunman's helmet she had punched from behind.

"Fire!" The lead gunman said opening fire on the woman in the orange suit who merely continued to grin as she disappeared from their sight again, only to reappear behind one of the gunmen that was advancing on Belle threateningly and send him to la-la land with a well placed neck chop. The other one quickly joined his comrade in snooze land thanks to a snap kick to his chest that sent him flying into the green stuff on the walls that was as hard as cement. Hiver grabbed Belle and vanished from sight again, taking the receptionist with her, as the remaining two gunmen opened fire on where she had been.

"Get under the tables." Hiver ordered the receptionist quietly as they reappeared behind the fourth gunman and Hiver made him pass out thanks to a too tight head lock that cut off his oxygen intake. Belle immediately took her order to heart and dove to hide under a table with Alisa while Q-Feuille merely sighed as she stood guard over them with some exploding chocolates in hand should the final gunman get too close.

"Must've put too much strength into that kick. Looks like I broke his back." Hiver said smirking slightly when she noticed how badly she had damaged that one boy she had kicked, although her smirk turned into a scowl when she realized that the final gunman had done something that made him and his comrades nearly naked again in order to summon some kind of beast.

"This…could be interesting." Hiver said calmly as she took in the large Genentech dragon that the final gunman had summoned.

"Winged puppy!" Ascouer happily exclaimed at the sight of what she thought was a large winged puppy made out of metal, her innocent exclamation causing Hiver to laugh at the look on the others faces at what she had called the dragon. What Hiver hadn't noticed was that Ascouer had managed to escape Sommers hold and take her cloths off again just before the giant dragon chomped down at where Ascouer and Sommer was, causing Hivers eyes to widen in horror.

"Bad puppy!" Ascouer exclaimed from the other side of the café causing Hiver to nearly collapse in relief. She had forgotten that when in grave danger like this Ascouers teleporting power tended to act up in order to get her and those touching her to safety.

"Now you've done it dragon." Hiver said grabbing her daughters old energy sword out of her pants pocket and extending it too full length as she glared at the dragon. That bastard had nearly killed her daughter, oh and Sommer too!

"Go mama!" Ascouer cheered her mama on from Sommers arms while Hiver attacked the dragon that focused on her now, although that might be because she had sliced off one of its arms.

"Yeehaw!" Ascouer exclaimed happily when the dragon lunged at her, causing her to teleport her and Sommer to safety again. This time they landed on the dragons back as it went berserk and proceeded to demolish the G.T.O. while Hiver chased after it with her sword while Sommer screamed in horror from atop the dragon.

"That ladies and gentlemen is why you do not piss off the director of the G.T.O." A news reporter in the lobby of the G.T.O. said when her camera man managed to catch a shot of Ascouer teleporting herself and Sommer to safety again while Hiver sliced the dragon clean in half.

"Asco-chan what happened to your cloths?" Hiver asked putting away the energy sword and immediately fretting worriedly over her daughter while nearby Sommer looked like he was having a heart attack. Ascouer merely blinked and grinned up at her mama.

"The puppy ate em!"


End file.
